So you’ve finally found someone to share a first date with! That’s great – hopefully you’re on your way to a healthy, long relationship with your new partner. But sometimes, that’s just not the case. Many people don’t know how to tell the signs that a first date went bad. Do you? In this guide, you’ll learn:
- How to read the signs that a first date went really bad
- How to make the most of a first date so that it doesn’t go bad
- How to avoid complications with someone after a first date gone wrong
Now, think back to your last first date, or ahead to the next. Then, read through this list of 6 signs your first date went really bad.
1. They were looking at their phone the whole time
Nothing says “I’m bored” like when your date is scrolling through news stories on her phone throughout your first date. Worse yet is when she’s texting her friends, while she’s supposed to be getting to know you.
One of the biggest signs of a bad first date is when her phone is on the table the whole time. It’s okay to request that you both put your phones away – after all, this date is about getting to know one another better! If she agrees, great! If she argues, that could be a sign the date’s not going so well.
- If your date is texting or looking at her phone throughout your date, that’s a bad sign
- You can request that you both put your phones away and focus on one another
- Keep in mind that some people may keep their phones out for safety reasons, especially on a first date
2. They brought a friend
Sometimes three’s a crowd. If your date decided to bring his buddy along with him, that’s a sign your date is going to be bad. That’s especially true if your female date brings a male friend and vice versa.
If your date brought his buddies along, maybe he wasn’t clear that this was to be a proper date. Gently ask him, saying something to the effect of, “Hey, I was hoping we could get to know each other a little better, just one on one.” If he declines to send his friend home, that’s a sign your date could be going bad.
- When your date brings a friend, that’s a sign of bad things to come
- Sometimes people may bring a buddy for safety reasons
- Don’t be afraid to ask your date for some one on one time
3. When your date won’t stay for dessert
If your date is going well, you want it to last a while, right? But what are the signs that your date is going bad? She doesn’t want to stay for dessert. If your date is flagging down the waiter as soon as she finishes her salad, it’s a good clue that you won’t be called for a second date.
There’s a rule you should always follow when you’re on a first date: never order anything that’s going to take a long time to cook. Opt for a salad or even fish or chicken, but stay away from things like baked potatoes. That way you have a chance to get to know each other while your food is being cooked, but aren’t stuck in a miserable situation for a long time.
That said, if your date orders a meal that only takes a few minutes to prepare and is still ready to split the tab when (or before) it’s eaten, she’s probably not going to be your new long term partner.
- If your date doesn’t want to stay for dessert, it’s one of the signs that the date went bad
- When you order, choose a food that doesn’t take a long time to prepare
- Dessert is a great way to extend a date – skipping it means the date didn’t go so well
4. He won’t talk
If he’s answering your questions in one word answers, or forgetting to ask you about yourself, it’s one of the signs of a bad date. First dates are all about getting to know one another better, so ask – and answer – appropriate questions. Talk about work, about family, about friends and hobbies. Then, gauge your date’s reaction and conversational interest.
If your date is quiet, it may very well mean he’s just shy. Give him some time to open up and begin to talk. Order a few drinks if you need to loosen his lips! But if he’s just giving you the cold shoulder, he’s not interested. Finish the date on a positive note, then move on to someone else.
- First dates are about getting to know one another
- If your date won’t ask or answer questions, it can be one of the signs of a bad first date
- Keep in mind he might just be shy, so give him a little time to warm up
5. You argue about stuff
If you’re already arguing on your first date, that’s one of the biggest signs the date has gone bad. It’s not entirely uncommon for people to argue about things like religion or politics on a first date. So, for the best results, steer clear of these conversations.
If she keeps goading you to engage in a debate about the prime minister of Canada or the Supreme Leader of North Korea, don’t engage – it’ll only get messy. Simply finish your vodka tonic, pay the bill (or your portion) and wish her a good night. There’s no need for that kind of drama in your life.
- First dates who argue are bad first dates
- Try to avoid talk of religion and politics with your first date – or any other sensitive subject
- If your date continues to goad you, simply finish up, pay, and leave
6. They ask you a lot of questions
If your date won’t talk about himself, he may be hiding something, and that’s one of the signs of a bad first date. Even if he’s not hiding something, the first date is all about getting to know one another, and if he won’t open up that’s a problem!
One of the ways people avoid talking about themselves is by focusing solely on asking you questions. They allow you to dominate the conversation, which isn’t only suspicious, it’s also going to make you feel uncomfortable!
If this happens to you, try to steer the conversation back to him. Ask him questions he can feel comfortable answering – maybe about his pets, his job or his kids if he has them. If he still won’t chat, it may be best to skip the second date and just move on to the next potential partner.
- Facing a barrage of questions about yourself might mean your date is hiding something
- If he won’t talk about himself, that puts pressure – and discomfort – on you
- Try to steer the conversation toward simple things like work, pets or kids
Conclusion
There’re all types of people out there. Some are shy, and they may not open up. Some are obsessed with their phones and just can’t put them down! There may be a very good reason your date doesn’t seem very excited. However, if you trust your gut, it’s not difficult to tell the signs of a bad first date. If you think the date’s not going anywhere, simply pay the check and wish your date a good night!
